Life is fragile ....... A note to Mom

The day is gray; the sky is weeping ...... kinda apro pos considering had Mom lived, today would be the 83rd anniversary of her grand entrance into this world. I can't even fathom living till 83 much less 50 (which is the expected "odometer" reading come next January). Simply boggles the mind that the span of one's lifetime is made up these 12 month increments spread out many years and that are supposed to reflect what it is that makes you YOU.

All I can say is that I miss her tremendously, but I'm satisfied that her long suffering finally ended. She was existing and in no way what could be construed as "living." Such a hard ending for such a kool lady. I LOVE & MISS YOU, MOM !!!

And I promise to keep myself out of trouble (unless IT comes looking for me !) and to take my meds like a good girl. I promise to try & keep my temper .... well, tempered. I promise to love & cherish the love of my life till the very end. I promise to keep the lines of communication open between my siblings -- can't guarantee THEY'LL reciprocate with each other. I promise to let more stuff roll off the back -- after all shit rolls downhill, right ?

I sincerely hope that I was more of a accomplishment than a disappointment in your eyes. In MY eyes, it's a crap shoot on most days. I sincerely hope you and Pop and Nana and Grandpa had a STUPENDOUS reunion (tell them all "HI ! I love youse guys and I'm doing fine.") !! When I imagine the most perfect setting , I see you and Pop cutting a rug to some Chet Atkins or Glenn Miller; maybe snuggling on the couch. These images are borne from my childhood memories and it's what I'd want Eternity to be for you !

I have to go now, but I just wanted to wish you the happiest of birthdays, Mom. I love & miss you more than I probably ever told you while you were only a phone call away. And don't worry too much over me -- I'm a tough old bird and it takes a lot to knock me down .... much less to keep me there !

LOVE YOU, MOM !!

Hunk-a Hunk-a

burnin MUSCLES !!!! OMG !!! Last evening I just did my first set of that resistance band 30 min video (I posted it earlier somewhere) from Spark People. Let's just say I was re-introduced (and quite rudely, I might add !) to a bunch of real slackers -- my hamstrings, obliques (HA !! THAT'S rich considering I can't find them thru the "padding"), biceps, lower back & calves.

This workout may seem simple (or even easy to some), but that 30 mins prit-near whooped MY 49.66 yr old butt !!! But I must say, I feel better for having done it & now I only have to wait till tomorrow to get more reacquainted with the aforementioned group of slackers.

OHHHHHHH, MAN ! Tween the boogeying & this routine, I'll be buff ....... in roughly 2 yrs !!!

PARTAAAAAAAAY ON, MY PEEPS FOR BEN GAY IS WATCHING YOU FROM THE SIDELINES !!!!

WOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOO !!! =D

No I didn't fall off the face of the Earth

The rumors of my untimely demise have been greatly exaggerated. Or however the saying goes. Anyhoo, I'm still amongst the living albeit tired & S-O-R-E.

You see, it was an extremely harried week at work & we've been trying to get the garden prepared for a fall planting. This proved to be a lethal combination for this train wreck known as my body. I carry all my stress in my head & shoulders. I awoke Friday with such a screaming headache, I thought I had succumbed to that dreaded post-menopausal curse ...... the MIGRAINE. Thankfully I remembered the trigger points from when my Mom used to suffer & thankfully I presented none, save the excruciating pain & belief that my head would explode -- secretly hoping for it.

Nope, it was just plain ol stress. Stress is a sneaky bastage -- by the time you realize it has taken up residence, you're contemplating murder or at the very least decapitation ...... of your OWN head. Now those in the know, say that a certain amount of stress is necessary for our survival -- it fuels the flight or fight response which is what keeps us one step ahead of the forces that threaten to defeat us. All I know is that I'd gladly share some of MY stress cos I think I got the King's share !

Enter my angel .... of sorts. I say of sorts, cos she can bring me to the verge of tears with just a touch. No, no it's not that her touch is so tender, so soft, so lulling. No her touch reaches deep into the core and drags out the toxins along with the knots upon knots UPON knots, that I so carefully attempt to carry without self-destructing. Prolly NOT as excruciating as childbirth but sure as hell rivals a good Charley-horse ANY day of the week !

This soft spoken, beautiful person is like stress -- sneaky and unrelenting. She knows I have a high threshold for pain & dangles me on that precipice before bringing me back only to repeat it .......... many times more. Sometimes I can't tell whose more exhausted at the end of a session -- her from trying to will those knots out with her bare hands, or me from desperately running an uphill marathon to my happy place -- never seeming to reach it before the "assault" is over.

Now don't get me wrong -- I do THIS willingly. She can work miracles and I will continue to allow her carte blanc over my body -- it's an odd relationship, but it works. Only because this morning I can turn my head to both sides without a shaft of pain blinding me. And my shoulder is looser & more mobile.

So here's to the person I love to "hate." Certified Massage Therapists RULE !!!